Recently by Andy Proudfoot

IT SEEMS like more than 13 months ago that we experienced one of the greatest five-day spells in our recent history in routing Real Madrid and Manchester United.

In fact, after watching some of the displays this season 13 light-years might seem nearer the mark.

Yet we now face two games in four days that may actually carry greater importance than those fantastic victories, which ultimately counted for nothing in the larger scheme of things.

BRILLIANT, isn't it? Just last week I used this column to make a plea that the obvious constraints placed on Rafa Benitez during the transfer window should not be used as the stimulus for another session of chest-beating about our absentee owners and their financial mismanagement of the club.

Not because they are not guilty of such a charge; just that it would provide another excuse for our under-performing manager and players to duck the blame for this season's debacle and provide further ammunition to the media to paint us as a crisis club, paving the way for the apparently inevitable exit of Gerrard, Torres and anybody else a bit miffed we may not be playing Champions league football next season.

So what do we get? Another blundering intervention by a member of our favourite American family: this time Bart stealing the initiative from dad Homer, sending a foul-mouthed email to a customer that would have got him the sack in almost any company you can think of.

IT'S not been a good week if you're a football fan.

I suppose by now we should be used to being taken for granted, fleeced for overpriced tickets and virtually strip-searched for having the temerity to attend an away fixture.

Now we can add being found guilty of inciting players to misbehave; being massively disrespected by those allegedly acting in our interest; and cheated by blatant play-acting.

FLORENCE and the Machine may be a success at the moment, but Florence without Mascherano certainly wasn't.

Tuesday night's humbling experience in the Stadio Artemio Franchi was a wake-up call so loud that the players' ears will still be ringing by the weekend.

Rafa Benitez may not have been surprised by the energy and creativity shown by Fiorentina, but you can be sure his team were.

IT WAS late Saturday night, and the two guys at the bar, who had enjoyed more than one or two scoops to celebrate Fernando Torres's return to form, were creating their own version of a famous Two Ronnies sketch.

"Whatever happened to..." said one. "Baby Jane?" replied the other.

"No, no, whatever happened to..." the first bloke tried again, this time to be met by "the Likely Lads?"